Nathaniel Scott Barnett

July 4, 2017

Dear Nathaniel, 

Today, you would have been 27 years old. I love and miss you so much! Life has never been the same and I suspect it never will be. You left us with a lot of fine memories and I am thankful for that and for all you have taught me. You taught me what is really important in life. I get sidetracked sometime but I am really trying. I believe I will see you again some day and that you are truly free. That gives me great comfort. Otherwise, I  am not sure I could make it.

Happy Birthday, son. You are not forgotten. I long to see you again!

Love always,
Mom

June 7, 2017...Nathaniel you are gone 9 years today, nine years since I saw and talked to you last. There are no words to express the loss. There is a quietness in our house and on our farm that cannot be replaced. There is an emptiness in my heart that cannot be fixed until I see you again. You are in my heart always.

You are missing many bad things in this world but I still wish things could have been different, that you did not have to go. God alone knows and I trust Him. I believe you are in a better place and are in the loving arms of God and I take comfort in that. 

I long to see you again, and I believe some day I will!

Love and missing you always,
Mom

Dear Nathaniel,

You would have been 26 years old today. That is hard for me to imagine! This year is the first year that seemed noticeably gentler to me and I believe you would have been alright with that. I even made a cake today and did not mope the whole day long which is a big improvement over years past. I love and miss you as much as ever but I realize that you are in a much better place than this wicked world and that gives me great comfort!

Snowflake had her calf today, confirmation to me that you are fine. Someone suggested that I name it Freedom and if we keep it, I think I will.

Happy Birthday, my little firecracker baby!

Love and missing you always,
Mom 

June 7, 2016...Eight years without you today, Nathaniel. Eight years closer to seeing you again. You left a huge empty space in our hearts and lives and it still does not seem real; it may never seem real to us and maybe that is how we cope. It seemed today was a little gentler on us; as we get older we know we do not have that long until we leave this earth and we are reunited with you. Our little farm is quiet and empty and we miss you so much. Life is never going to be the same, and that is just the way it is. You would not want us to be sad; we are trying. Our comfort is that you are in a better place, diabetes free, and free of the awful things of this life, which are many. We long to see you again; we believe some day we will. What a glad reunion day that will be!

Love and missing you always,
Mom

Nathaniel, it is my 8th Christmas without you. Although I am more accustomed to living without you, the hole in my heart is the same as it was the day you left. Our little farm is sad and lonely without you and my life will never be the same. I make it the best I can and try to not think too much about how much I have lost. It is what you would want. I am glad there is a better life after this one and that I WILL see you again some day. Merry Christmas in heaven my son.

Love and missing you always,
Mom